Girl Lost Page 12

  Jackson got up and looked out the window. I watched him cross the room. He didn’t look my way. “I guess we’re going to have to spend the night,” he announced. “It’s still a raging blizzard out there.”

  “I don’t want to spend the night. I want to go home. Besides, Adam and Sarah will be worried.” My clothes that had been hanging in front of the fireplace were mostly dry by then and I got up to get them.

  Jackson walked toward me. “Don’t be stupid. You’ll never make it all the way home in this storm.”

  “Well, I’m gonna try. And, don’t call me stupid,” I responded. “Turn around so I can get dressed.”

  “No, you’re not.” He grabbed me by the arm to stop me.

  “Stop it. I’m leaving whether you like it or not!” I screamed.

  “Please, Madison, be reasonable. You’ll freeze to death out there. It will probably be fine in the morning. We can go then.” He let go of my arm.

  I thought for a moment. I could sense that he was sincere and I relented. He was right, I would freeze to death out there.

  “Okay, I’ll stay. I just want to..” And before I could finish that sentence, he leaned in and kissed me. I was so startled that I forgot what I was saying and just stood there for a moment. I noticed that his lips were warm and soft. Then I leaned in and kissed him back.

  I had never kissed a boy before, so I really didn’t know what I was doing. He didn’t seem to notice or mind. It was amazing. We kissed for about two or three minutes, when I noticed that he was unwrapping the blanket from me. I let it happen. When he got the blanket open, he stepped inside and wrapped it around both of us.

  I felt an excitement that I had never felt before. It was like electricity running through my body. It was an amazing feeling and I pressed my body close to his. Then his hands starting moving around my body. It was heaven.

  Then he stopped suddenly. I pulled back a little to ask him why and saw that he was unbuttoning his jeans. Oh boy, this was all new to me. I was afraid and excited all at the same time. He took his pants off and pulled me down to the floor with him. I went eagerly.

  Our lovemaking was a little awkward, but amazing. He knew this was my first time and he was very gentle. He took his time and we were exhausted afterward. We must have fallen asleep very quickly.

  When I woke up, I realized Jackson wasn’t with me. The fire was dying down and it was really dark in the cabin and chilly. I pulled the blanket tight around me as my eyes started adjusting to the darkness. I started getting scared that he just left me there. I couldn’t believe he would do that, so where was he? I jumped up, threw off the blanket and got dressed quickly. My clothes were completely dry by then. The cabin wasn’t very big, so after a quick walk through, it was obvious he was not inside. So, I headed outside. It was freezing. The blizzard had let up, but it was still snowing a little. And, it was almost pitch black outside. No moon that I could find. I could barely see where I was going.

  “Jackson,” I whispered in the dark. “Are you out here?” No answer, so I walked toward where I thought the barn was. I told myself that maybe he went to feed the horses or something. But, in the back of my mind I was scared to death that he had taken both the horses and ditched me. I’m going to hell for all of this, I thought. Was this my punishment? Being abandoned out here in the pitch black, freezing night?

  “Jackson,” I whispered again. Just then, something tripped me. Down I went. The ground was rocky and it hurt like hell, even though there was a deep layer of fresh snow. I could feel a warm rush of liquid dripping down my arm, and knew I was bleeding.

  “Son of a..” A hand grabbed my left arm and pulled me up.

  “Are you okay?” Jackson asked me. “What are you doing out here?”

  “I woke up and couldn’t find you anywhere. I thought you left me.”

  “Sweetheart, I will never leave you.” I couldn’t see his face, but I knew he was sincere. I could hear it in his voice. I had to smile at that.

  He dropped an armload of firewood as I grabbed him around his waist and hugged him tight, almost in tears.

  “Why are you whispering anyway?” he asked.

  “I don’t know. It’s dark and scary out here. It seemed like I should whisper,” I answered back.

  “Let’s go back inside where it’s warm.” He picked up the firewood and led the way. I followed while holding onto the back of his shirt. I didn’t want to fall again.

  “Why didn’t you wake me to come help you get the firewood?” I asked him.

  “You looked so beautiful sleeping there that I didn’t have the heart to wake you.”

  He could be very charming when he wanted to. I knew my heart was going to get into a lot of trouble around him. Jackson put more wood on the fire and it started really blazing. It felt great. I hadn’t realized how cold I was.

  When he turned back to me he saw my arm. “You’re bleeding.”

  “Oh, yeah.” Being caught up in the moment, I had completely forgotten.

  Jackson went into the kitchen and found a small towel in one of the drawers and brought it back to where I was sitting. He then used it to wipe away the blood, most of it was dry by then anyway.

  "Oh, I almost forgot about these! I found them in my jacket when I was outside.” He pulled the sandwiches and water bottles that we had packed for lunch out of his jacket pocket.

  I suddenly realized I was famished. “I completely forgot too. I’m starving,” I said with excitement as I reached for the food and water. “I haven’t eaten all day.”

  We ate and talked for a while. Neither one of us bringing up what had happened earlier. Finally, I decided that we really needed to talk about it. I was embarrassed, but what I wanted to say really needed to be said.

  “Jackson, about earlier..” I started to say.

  “Let me guess,” he interrupted me, putting his palm up toward me for emphasis. “It was a mistake and we shouldn’t do it again. Am I right?” He sounded a little sarcastic.

  “Well, yeah, I guess. I wasn’t going to say it exactly like that, but yeah. Is it wrong? We are cousins after all,” I said, trying really hard not to get sarcastic back.

  “It’s not a big deal that we’re cousins. So what? It’s not illegal. I don’t know why you’re making such a big thing out of it.” He was starting to get rude.

  “I’m not making a big thing out of it. I thought we could just talk about it.” I was starting to get angry then. My voice was getting louder and a little more high pitched.

  “So what do you want to do? Pretend it never happened? Fine, it never happened. Are you happy?” He was really mad then.

  “Why are you getting so mad? I didn’t say I wanted to pretend it never happened. I just don’t think we should tell anyone. I’m worried about what people will think. That’s all I was trying to say.” I burst into tears.

  After a few seconds, Jackson reached over and pulled me into his arms. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I thought you were going to blame me for this. Or you were going to hate me for it.”

  “I don’t blame you or hate you,” I replied. I was calming down a bit.

  “Actually, I think it’s a good idea that we don’t tell anyone. Adam and Sarah will flip out,” Jackson said.

  “Yeah, no kidding,” I responded.

  We fell asleep in each other’s arms in front of the roaring fire. It was heaven.

  Chapter 18

  The next morning we woke up to the sun streaming in through the dirty window by the front door of the cabin. The fire had gone out, but we were warm, all snuggled together under the blanket. We didn’t linger though. We knew my parents would be worried, so we hurriedly got dressed and headed home.

  We rode home as fast as we could. We didn’t say much on the ride home. There really wasn’t much to say. When we reached the ranch, all hell broke loose. Sarah and Adam must have been watching the stables, because the instant we got off the horses, they were right there beside us, with Sam Perez in tow. We tried our best not to l
ook guilty. But I felt like what we did the previous night was tattooed across my forehead. Could they tell? I certainly hoped not.

  “Where the hell have you two been?” Sarah demanded. “We’ve been worried sick.”

  Jackson and I looked at each other, then quickly looked away.

  “What was that?” she asked as her eyes darted back and forth between the two of us. “That look you two just gave each other?” She sounded so accusatory.

  “Nothing,” Jackson said. “We’re sorry we worried you. We got caught in the storm and had to spend the night in an old cabin we found.”

  “We called the police,” Adam finally jumped in.

  “I see that,” Jack said, looking over at Sam.

  “We said we were sorry. We didn’t do it on purpose.” I was getting angry. They could have come out there and been genuinely worried and asked how we were. But, no. They came out yelling and acting like we got caught in the storm on purpose. They were the most frustrating people I had ever met.

  “You okay baby girl?” Sam asked me very gently.

  I looked at him, and with just the slightest smile, I nodded. It was barely perceptible. I’m not sure anyone else even noticed. But, apparently it was good enough for Sam, because he turned around and headed directly for his car, without another word to anyone. I was really starting to like that man.

  I handed the horse over to Walter and I walked toward the house. I needed a shower, some breakfast and a nap. Not necessarily in that order. I could feel their eyes on my back. I didn’t care and I didn’t turn around. I left Jackson standing there to smooth things over with them. He was good at handling them, way better than I was. My temper usually flared up fairly quickly and made things worse. I knew this about myself, but it still happened. This time I was just too exhausted to deal with them.

  When I got up from my nap it was early afternoon. I found Adam and apologized one more time for worrying him. He told me that they were sorry for jumping all over us when we got back. They were just scared and it brought out the worst in them.

  I didn’t see Jackson the rest of the day. Maybe he was sleeping, I didn’t know. I didn’t want to start asking people where he was. I was trying to be nonchalant and act like I didn’t care where he was. If anyone was suspicious they didn’t act like it. In fact, I was probably the one acting weird. I really wanted to see him. It had only been a few hours, but I missed him. He was the only one in that big stupid house that I really cared about. Was he avoiding me?

  Later that night I was awakened by a gentle touch on my shoulder. It was Jackson. I smiled and opened the blankets so he could climb in the bed with me. Nothing happened that night. We just wanted to be together and we lay there and talked most of the night.

  He sneaked away to his room around dawn. I was afraid someone would be up early, or hear the floors squeaking as he tiptoed down the hall. But, as far as I knew, no one was the wiser.

  We spent a lot of time together after that. Even Sarah and Adam noticed. Occasionally we would stage a fake fight and ignore each other for a couple days, so people would just think we were acting like brother and sister. Sometimes our fights were real though. We both had tempers and when we disagreed, it was an all out battle. But, we always got over it. We spent most of our time together talking about life. I told him how much I hated having a tutor and he told me how much he hated school too. It was possibly our mutual misery that held us together. We were very careful not to let anyone see us together too much.

  “Well, aren’t you two thick as thieves these days?” I didn’t even have to turn around. I knew it was Annabelle standing behind me. I was alone at the stables brushing Jett.

  “What do you want, Annabelle?” I spun around and stared her down.

  “I know what’s going on between you and Jackson,” she said, with a snide tone to her voice.

  “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” I responded.

  “I’ve seen him sneaking out of your room early in the morning,” she snarled.

  Oh, that was just great, I thought. I guess we weren’t as sneaky as I thought we were. I hesitated for only a second. What was the point in denying it? She obviously saw us.

  “So what? Jealous?” I wasn’t backing down and I wasn’t afraid of her.

  “I wonder what Sarah and Adam will think about your slumber parties?”

  “You wouldn’t,” I said. She succeeded in scaring me.

  “Don’t count on it,” she taunted as she turned around and headed back to the house.

  I was fuming after that. I couldn’t stand that girl. I don’t know how we ever became friends in the first place. I guess I was just lonely when I first arrived at the ranch and she was close to my age. She was nice to me and I didn’t have anyone else to talk to at the time. But I finally saw her true colors once she realized Jackson liked me. Actually long before there was anything going on between the two of us, she was jealous. Now, she must be livid. She kind of scared me a little. She was one of those people that you never knew what she was capable of until it was too late. I had to start watching my back around her.

  I found Jackson in the house talking business with Adam. I waited until they were done and we headed to the garden to talk. It was private there. I told him what happened with Annabelle and he was furious.

  “I’ll have a talk with her,” he responded.

  Later, he told me that he paid Annabelle to keep her mouth shut. He didn’t know how long it would work, but hopefully for a while.

  A few days later Jackson became really ill with the stomach flu. It was pretty nasty. Adam called the doctor and he came to the house to see Jackson. I had never heard of a doctor that made house calls. I thought that hadn't been done since the old west. Well, I guess when you are rich, anything is possible.

  Of course, Sarah was a doctor, but she said that since she didn’t really practice much at all, we should call the family physician.

  He told us that Jackson just needed rest, fluids, and some medicine to help him sleep. The doctor had someone deliver the medicine from the pharmacy.

  Adam assigned Annabelle to take care of Jackson. I wasn’t happy about it at all, but what was I going to say? I had no reason to protest. If I did, it might look suspicious to everyone. So, I kept my mouth shut.

  Not long after he got sick, I saw Annabelle head to the kitchen to get him some lunch, so I sneaked into Jackson’s room.

  “Madison!” His voice was barely above a whisper.

  “Hi. I came to see how you are feeling. I’m sorry to say this, but you look awful.”

  He chuckled.

  He really did look terrible. He was very pale and so weak, he could barely sit up. I let him hold on to my arm while he struggled to sit up.

  “Do you need me to get the doctor back over here? Whatever he’s doing is not working.” I was genuinely concerned for him.

  “No, I’ll be fine. It’s just a bad case of the flu.”

  “Well, I miss you. I hate having to stay away.”

  “I know. Me too.” he replied.

  “Well, you need your rest. Besides, Annabelle will be back soon with your lunch.” I started to get up and he grabbed my hand.

  “Please come back later. I miss your beautiful face.” That made me smile.

  “Are you going to give me the flu? I’m pretty sure it’s contagious. I definitely don’t want what you have.” I kind of smiled, but I really didn’t want to catch it. I didn’t even know for sure if it was contagious, but I didn’t want to take any chances.

  “How am I supposed to know if it’s contagious? You seem fine. You probably would have gotten it by now.” He struggled to speak.

  “I will come back soon, I promise.” And I meant it. He was right, if I was going to get it I probably would have by then. So, I would take my chances.

  Jackson’s flu went from days to weeks and he wasn’t getting any better. He had headaches, diarrhea, nausea, and was tired all the time, and sometimes even seemed confused. It did
n’t sound like the flu at all to me. I was really starting to worry about him. I looked it up and usually the stomach flu lasts up to ten days, not weeks. That freaked me out.

  I had had enough and stormed into Adam’s office one day.

  “You need to take Jackson to the hospital. The flu doesn’t last this long and that doctor is not helping him at all. It can’t be the flu,” I demanded.

  Adam seemed startled by my demand. “You are right. Sarah and I were just talking about that this morning. I was just about to go up and tell Jackson. Please go have the driver bring the car around and we’ll take him now.”

  “Well, that’s more like it!” I ran to get the driver. We all rode to the hospital together. Jackson looked worse than ever. Annabelle had gone into town for some more supplies. She would just have to find out from the staff where we went.

  After two days of every test you can possibly think of, the doctors informed us that Jackson had arsenic poisoning.

  “What the hell?” Adam replied, clearly shocked by the news. We all were.

  “How could that happen?” Sarah asked, almost in tears. I just stood there speechless.

  “Well, he’s been ingesting it. Someone has probably been feeding it to him. Is anyone else in the house sick?” the doctor asked.

  “No, everyone is just fine,” Adam responded, clearly perplexed. “Are you sure that’s what the problem is?”

  “I’m positive. The blood tests confirmed it. Who has been preparing his meals?” the doctor asked us.

  It took me just a second, then it hit me. “Oh my god. Annabelle.”

  “What? Why would Annabelle do this? She and her mother have worked for me for a lot of years. She’s always been a sweet girl. I think you’re wrong. It couldn’t have been her,” Adam responded.

  “Listen, Annabelle is not what you think. She has been harassing me and Jackson for a while now. She has some sort of obsession with him and has been threatening me. She wants me to stay away from him. Jackson said he saw her push me into the cake at my birthday party. She’s crazy. I don’t doubt for a second that it was her.” I blurted it all out at once and had to catch my breath.